brainchild lost

so, call me a terible copycat, but upon reading a few of my friend's blogs, I've decided to create my own center for self-indulgent rambling

and perhaps it's not really such a good idea, since the semester is almost over and I will be returning to middle of nowhere, tx, where I have no home internet connection. sad, I know

but for now, here I am.

I don't know what to say for myself, other than that I am brainchild lost. creative? sure. intelligent? so they tell me. my main downfall? sometimes I'm just plain lost. expression so true and genuine sometimes just comes out like total and utter crap.

well fuck it, I don't care. personally, I'd like to believe that someone out there will find me interesting. someone will read my ramblings and might just possibly find them interesting. might actually want to get inside my head

I'm just looking for a willing audience


so, yes, a bit about myself, then, shall I?
I'm a college freshman, just finishing up my second semester
plan on majoring in psych (can I climb in your head some time??) and theatre design/tech
only child from a lower middle class family, trying desperately to make it at a highly selective private university

on that note,

why the fuck did I choose to go to such a difficult school?
neither of my parents even got a BA
hell, my mother wouldn't touch college with a ten-foot pole
all I had to do was go to any university and I'd be better off than them

so why here?
why am I working my butt off?

I know why
Just to be able to say I did it
It's some sort of badge of honor for me to be here
And if I fail?
Well let's just assume that I won't

well, that's really all I've got for now

tune in next time for another wonderful installment of brainchild lost