8 days till londonandthe patrick

first of all.....

LEAVING FOR LONDON IN 8 DAYS LEAVING FOR LONDON IN 8 DAYS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

It's scary. I'll arrive in a country I've never been to and have to follow written directions involving public transportation to my destination.... alone.

I don't much like traveling alone when I'm in an unfamiliar place. But at least it's an English speaking country, right?



secondly, the patrick

I miss him.

He's taking steps right now to get his life into better working order. Which is terrific and I'm so happy that he seems to be headed in the right diretion. But the sucky part is that this means that he has less time for other things.... Like me. I know he needs this time. But I miss him now that he's so busy. And I worry about him sometimes.

I guess I sometimes think that if we don't spend much time together that he'll lose interest. Like.... I'm keeping up some sort of act and I don't want to lose my audience. (the fact that I will soon be out of the country for a whole month doesn't help this any.) But I know that doesn't make sense. We have a good time together and I know that he wants me in his life. And it's not like I'm lacking for companions otherwise.

I just wish things were better for him so that things could be better for the both of us.



And now my self-indulgent rambling is done for the day.
Thanks!

must needs cuddles

I'm tired, a little out of it, and stressed (some interpersonal issues).

I'm not entirely sure why, but I felt compelled to post something, so here I am.

I guess, one, I don't like people telling me what to do when I haven't asked them for guidance. It's an intersting stab at my pride that never fails to make me turn stubborn. (There's a great comment I could make here but I'll refrain.)

Two, lack of communication is one thing I really can't handle for very long if there's something I feel needs to be said. (Yes, yes, yes, I know, I'm such a woman...)

Three, MUST NEEDS CUDDLES.

Now I go to bed. G'night moon.

Breakfast

As I sit here eating my breakfast of half off-brand Rice Crispies and half off-brand Lucky Charms (at almost 4:30 in the afternoon), I come to realize something genious.


They really should put little marshmallow things in Rice Crispies.

Really, tho, they're nothing like marshmallows, right? Other than the fact that they are entirely comprised of sugar...

Huh.

Well, my cereal's getting soggy. Later!

Robin Williams - Fukitol

LOVE this one.

More

Robin Williams on Winter Sports and Canada

I love you, Robin Williams.

BZDEAL

do you ever lie in Bed and desire to fashion yourself a perfect friend out of the air around you?

who will cuddle with you? make you laugh? Zap the tinges of shadow that hide at the corners of your eyelids?

if only it were so easy to call such a force to light Darkness

golden hearted sunshine, an Entire pocket full of rose-tinted glasses

A salve for wounds the world hath given

perfect Love

Honesty Box

As most of the people who are likely to read this already know, Facebook has a fuck ton of new optional applications that were created by users. One of the ones I have recently added is the Honesty Box. Basically, any one of your friends can type a completely anonymous comment in a box on your profile that only you can read.

I think it's an interesting idea.

Anyhow, I got the best compliment in my Honesty Box last night.
It said "You are very real. And that's very rare."

Huge compliment.


I smile and go get breakfast now. Yay.
Latorz.

the beautiful things

there are moments when you just become paralyzingly aware of the beautiful things in life

it's when you take your lover by the hand and your eyes smile at each other
when you finally become secure in the idea that life will never throw you more than you can handle
when you laugh for little more reason than the fact that you're drunk with the hilarity of good friends
when the dew glistens across a grassy field lit by the golden dawn of a new day
when, on any day of the week, ten million things could have gone wrong and nothing did

these are the things that we need to hold on to


until next time, all

blrg

I think I may have developed some sort of outdoor allergy. I've been sneezing a lot lately whenever I go out and my nose is runny for the longest time after I go in and just blah.

So that's downright appetizing.

I just had a really weird experience online.
I was playing the new flower game on Facebook and this one guy and I slowly start talking and by the time we're done playing we've exchaned SNs and started chatting through AIM.

Now don't get confused. I'm not going romantic here. And def not sex. This guy is just legitimatey friend material; 100%. So weird to "meet" someone that way and really think you'd like to hang out and be friends.


Man, I'm out.
Till next time.

Oh, I Forgot to Mention...

My dog recently died....

Rest in peace, honey.

Patrick

Alright, so, the new boy. I met him at a party at the end of last April. He looked like this:


Something like a month later we meet up for dinner, and it begins.
I didn't think I'd like him all that much, but I just felt so comfortable with him and he was so very sweet to me.
We began to talk more and spend more time together and, what do you know, it went well.
So yay.

Now here's some more pictures!!




He took me to six flags. It was good times.

And speaking of times, until next time.

The Awesome

I love my life so much right now.

I've got a great apartment in a great location. I've got an awesome roomate with the cutest cat. I'm making good grades. I'm going to spend this July in London, including a performance on the Globe Theatre stage. My family is proud of me. My friends love me. My lovers, too.

My life... is as perfect as it could ever be.




And so I'm kind of wondering what's gonna come along and fuck it all up........
(Lord forbid, of course)


Until next time, all.

twitter

have a new boy

things are looking good

more info to come, methinks

TURTLE SEX!!!

In order to escape the craziness that was our apartment today, the residents of Chez Awesome ventured to the place where dreams coem true. Well... that is, if you dream about tons of animals all in one place to be stared at while they eat their rations. That's right, the St Louis Zoo.

It was the usual. Tons of kids at every turn, reminding us of how much we really don't want children. Animals sleeping. Animals eating. But, more importantly, animals having sex.

Tho I've visited the zoo many times since starting school at WashU, never had I witnessed animals actually getting it onfor all to see. Little did I know that one very persistant turtle would change all that.

All I can remember is the harsh grunt and the screech of shell against shell as the guy worked away. We were mesmerized. Could not look away. (Neither could the little girl next to us, who's father was taking a video of the event)

It was.... odd. But all I can say is you go, Turtle man, you go.

Flying Squirrel Attacks Gay Man on Pink Mini Scooter

Oh what to say, what to say.

Moved into an apartment close to campus.
Got a new tatoo (picture to come).
Finished my Sophomore year.
I'm going to study abroad in London this July.

Guess those are the big ones. But anyway... detailed accounts of my awesome adventures are likely to come in the furture. Just wanted to say that I'm still here and that I plan on picking the blog up again.


So.... to sum it up, Aarthi

-->

Awesome Song by Switchfoot

Faust, Midas, And Myself

This one's about a dream
I had last night
How an old man tracked me home
And stepped inside
He put his foot inside the door
And gave a crooked smile
Something in his eyes
Something in his laugh
Something in his voice
That made my skin crawl off

He said, "I've seen you here before
I know your name.
You could have your pick
Of pretty things.
You could have it all
Everything at once.
Everything you've seen,
Everything you'll need,
Everything you've ever had in fantasies."

"You've one life,
You've one life.
You've one life left to lead."

I woke up from my dream
As a golden man
With a girl I've never seen
With golden skin
I jumped up to my feet
She asked me what was wrong
I began to scream
I don't think this is me
Is this just a dream
Or really happening?

What direction?
What direction?
I'm splitting up!
I'm splitting up!
This is my personal disaffection

What direction? What direction?
What direction now?

I looked outside the glass
At golden shores
Golden ships and masts
With golden cords
As my reflection passed
I hated what I saw
My golden eyes were dead
And a thought passed through my head
A heart that is made of gold can't really beat at all

I wanted to wake up again
Without a touch of gold

What direction?
Death or action!
Life begins at the intersection.

I woke up as before
But the gold was gone
My wife was at the door
With her night robe on
My heart beat once or twice
And life flooded my veins
Everything had changed
My lungs had found their voice
And what was once routine
And what was once routine was now the perfect joy

You've one life
You've one life
One life left to lead

So, Just to Throw This Out There...

I am not monogamous. Most of my friends know this. If you did not know this, well then here it is.
So, with that out of the way...

How, in the space of one month, did I go from being involved with one person to being involved with four (maybe 5.... it's a little uncertain right now)? I mean, it's great. It can get complicated... but it's great. Really.

I guess I'm just concerned slightly with the sort of wrap people tend to get when they openly date more than one person. At least I'm open about it, right? Right.

Eh. Whatever.

In other news, the upcoming ALA meeting should frickin' rock like nothing else. If you ever make it to a single meeting, make it to this one. I believe edge play and flogging are on the agenda. *happy dance*

One other thing.... LOOK AT THESE FRICKIN' AWESOME PICTURES OF THE MAKE-UP I DID FOR A PLAY I WAS IN THIS PAST WEEKEND!!!!!




Rock on, all.

Brendan

This is Brendan in the background here. If you don't really know me and/or know about Brendan, this will mean nothing to you, but the mise-en-scene of this photo says a WHOLE lot about the relationship we have.

And that's pretty much it.
Bye now!

My 20th Birthday

That's right, you guys. As of yesterday, I am no longer a teenager.

I started the day at Kurt's apartment after spending the night, but could not stay with him long. There were things to be done, and little did I know just how many things there were going to be.

Kenzie picked me up from Webster Groves and we headed out to the mall where we trolled, as has become our style. After that, it was to PF Chang's, where we staked out places at the bar, flirted with a cute bartender we'd met the last time we were there, and convinced the staff that it was my 22nd birthday (rather than my 20th). As it stood, we got 5 free drinks between us and a free dessert. From there, it was back to Kenzie's so she could change, and then to my party at my place (which I ended up being an hour late to).

So, the good:
A fair number of people showed up and seemed to have a good time.
Adam was there.
Adam wore a dress.
Kurt was there.
I got to kiss Kenzie (for the third or fourth time that night).
And I got to make out with Ariel for while (for the first time ever). See, look, photographic evidence! ->



And, the bad:
Tho I'm not comfortable saying how, I ended up hurting Kurt's feelings. (Which I really hate.) And no, it does not have anything to do with kissing Kenzie or Ariel.


The good outweighs the bad in quantity, but in quality, it's feeling the opposite...

Le sigh.


Until next time, all, remember always to live, love, and laugh fully.